As my contribution this week, I'm going to write a series of posts about being a new mother, some thoughts I've been meaning to write down for quite a while. I read other people's birth stories and baby experiences and sometimes think, "Not exciting. Same thing happened/is happening to me." But I keep reading because those similarities are what bind us together as women, and the differences keep things interesting. Much of what I'm going to say is probably run of the mill, but the following experiences are unique because they are mine.
The first one comes from a post I drafted March 13th of this year but never posted. At this point M-Dubb was almost a month old.
First of all, I'm not special anymore. I mean, I am, but no one else can tell just from looking at me. Walking down the street during the 3rd trimester I stood out. There goes Amy waddling to class. Look at that super pregnant woman. Men used to look at me and smile all with the same kind of knowing/eerily pleased smile. I don't know what they were thinking, but I liked to think it was some kind of combination of checking me out and being awed by my pregnant aura.
But, this past week I started teaching my face to face folklore class on campus again. This means I go out alone, without my baby, who's safe at home with his daddy. I get a break from being mommy, but, as such, my clear identifying marker as tired, nursing mother to a newborn is absent. Today, a girl coming down the sidewalk in my direction did not move for me. She made me move for her. At first I was put out because didn't she know I am pregnant!? No, she didn't because I'm not anymore. Doesn't she know I'm exhausted and doing great things!? No, I'm just a normal looking woman going to campus. No one realizes what a big deal it is that I'm back at school, working in the computer lab, teaching classes already. No real maternity leave for me, people! But that makes me think: who else of the people I pass every day are making huge leaps of faith or overcoming their own Olympian obstacles or are just plain special? Probably everyone in their own way. Some more than others, but it's better to assume more.
